Thanksgiving 2008. It is a chilly, but sunny day here in Connecticut. I've been to the cemetary to visit Mom's grave- and can't help but feel a bit bittersweet and sad today. Thanksgiving was always Mom's holiday to do- and not walking into her kitchen still feels wrong to me, even now, nearly 5 years later.
Shortly, I will drive to dad and shirely's place and we'll go for dinner. It won't be the same as sitting around Mom's candlit table, surrounded by the plates, smells and comforts of the traditions I've known since childhood, but it will still be good.
I am thankful- for Shirley's presence in my dad's life. For the great gift of the friends who surround me with love and support daily. For what level of health I do have available to me- and for not being further incapacitated from Lymes disease. For living in a country where we can speak up and cause change to happen.
Life is hard, but it is also good- we just need to take the time to look beneath the surface.
Bright Blessings, Peace and Love to all
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Godpuppy DT's and Creative Frenzy
Oh Dear-
I returned home and puppy withdrawal hit full force. I missed that fuzzy face so much this week it wasn't funny. Not much going on to distract me either. Enter my beloved Stamping Cybergroup who set August 1st for our next swap deadline.
Holy Moly- I did all 7 of my artist trading cards for the swap this afternoon- now taking a break from cleaning up the creative vortex that occurred as a result. I'm really happy with this batch- my body is giving out, but the sense of humor is alive and kicking. You just have to love that I was doing beach themed ATC's while watching Shark Week on the Discovery Channel.
I've posted my favorite of this grouping: Our theme was Red Hot Summer/Good Old Summertime. I just giggled my way through this one. My tongue in cheek homage to a New England classic- yummy clambakes on the beach. Fun to go to, but hell on earth to host, especially if you actually do this on the beach. Yes, the sand is authentic, from Calf Pasture Beach in Norwalk, Ct.
Tomorrow, they all get mailed to this month's ATC Swap host- and I impatiently await the newest miniature works of art from cyberspace. Well, it will be nice to get something aside from bills in the mail- it helps ease the monthly panic attack when I have to write the checks.
Friday, July 18, 2008
Adventures in Babysitting
All this week, I've been at my friends' condo puppysitting for Jack- aka Fuzzerbugger. It's been a long time since I last had a full time dog. I'm kind of rusty, but the routine comes back easily. Apparently, like riding a bike, you never forget.
And, he's very easy and fun. Loves to play and drag you through the park on walkies. Who knew that a 30 pound cockapoo is really a husky or malamute in disguise? The best though have been the amazing snuggle sessions. Heaven really is having a dog on the foot of your bed at night- except Jack's version is to sneak up until his head is next to yours on the pillow. I finally gave up on trying to get him to stay at the foot. As long as he leaves my teddy bear alone we're ok. this morning, i woke up with a head on my stomach and a paw over my hand. guess he's feeling nice and secure.
Yesterday, I took him to the real dog park, near my home. It was a place where the original godpuppy and I spent many happy hours walking shaded and peaceful trails. He loved it. And I wished I could let him off leash to play with the other dogs, but he is a Houndini and will escape if given a chance. He loved it- tons of new smells, lots of trees to claim and it was a nice place to be given the heat here this week. Jack jumped up on Muji's rock and barked his triumph to the world. He looked so proud of himself.
Of course, it isn't a godmommy visit without a trip to puppy toys 'r us. As if Jack didn't have enough toys already- he really did need a few more. His favorite new baby is a plush fish. He's been carrying it around with him everywhere. At one point Fishy was on my face and very soggy. Jack is smart- if you tell him to bring a specific toy he will. At least 2 hours a day are spent tossing toys up or down the steps. when i get tired doing it, he does it for himself.
I've had fun with him- and I'll certainly miss the boy when it is time for me to turn him back over to his mom and dad. at the same time, we stopped at home for a little while, and i found myself longing for my little hovel. there is always that awareness that you aren't in your own space. i miss the familiar noises, dustbunnies and being in my own clutter.
Time to walk the doggie!
Jack says woof to everyone out there.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Summer Progress Commences
Greeting Minions,
Summer Progress through the shires and villages of the realm began yesterday. Lord Barney and I left the miscreant in the dungeon and enjoyed the sights, smells and sounds of our visit to Penniforth.
My knights and squires are seriously lacking. The joust was pitiful and the loser was scarce worth the effort of marination and spit roasting over the bonfire. And, the human chess match.. Great Goddess, these lumps of humanity need assistance.
We were joined by an acquantaince of the human and two tasty morsels. Alas, the human slipped calm draught into my mead, so I was unable to partake of the delicacies. It might be worth faking "good behavior and social skills" to avoid being drugged. Bah! I am a dragon- I SHALL BE SNARKY! Besides, I am ruler of all known realms and universes, what I say shall be.
There were excellent artisans- at least there, my subjects are up to standard. I came home with moldavite and a lovely wooden rune box. Rook is in high favor in the court- her woodburned boxes are suitable for royal dragons.
Alas, court matters prevail- live as Empress is never quiet.
Until we journey again,
Cordelia
Sunday, July 6, 2008
An AHA! Moment
It has been a week of indulging in a full out blue funk. To hell with it- i needed it- and I'm not done yet. I try hard not to drag everyone else into it. I just go into my little bear cave and hibernate. Dad started this round. I love the dude, but we just don't get each other.
Conversations with dad go something like this.. hi dad, i'm tired, no, no job yet, still looking.. and 3 minutes later, we have the conversation again- and again. My patience level is shot.
Some of this funk is stemming from lymes treatment. Lots of it came from the disaster of my actual birthday. Even more is the uncertainty of not knowing where next month's expenses are going to come from in time. Rockbottom is never a good place to be- especially if you're not sure how to keep pushing the rock back up the hill.
Over the weekend, my friends kidnapped me and we celebrated my birthday. It was the one thing that got me out of the house last week. How wonderful to be with people who know you, love you and understand that sometimes, you just can't fake and grit your teeth, politely lie or pretend to be in a good mood or feeling well. And somewhere that night, the funk lifted. A simple, low key evening- and absolutely perfect for me. Homecooked dinner, the fuzzerbugger racing around with his toys, playing taboo for the first time. I wish I could have been there for my actual birthday, rather than at a fancy country club with a room full of strangers.
One of my gifts was a little magnet that reads, "friends are the family you choose for yourself" and how true it is. The more my blood family irritates me, the more I appreciate my friends.
So, there is my AHA! moment- and I bottle the laughter from our evening of playing Taboo and watching Jack race around the condo like a hyperactive energizer bunny. Uncork and enjoy as needed.
Conversations with dad go something like this.. hi dad, i'm tired, no, no job yet, still looking.. and 3 minutes later, we have the conversation again- and again. My patience level is shot.
Some of this funk is stemming from lymes treatment. Lots of it came from the disaster of my actual birthday. Even more is the uncertainty of not knowing where next month's expenses are going to come from in time. Rockbottom is never a good place to be- especially if you're not sure how to keep pushing the rock back up the hill.
Over the weekend, my friends kidnapped me and we celebrated my birthday. It was the one thing that got me out of the house last week. How wonderful to be with people who know you, love you and understand that sometimes, you just can't fake and grit your teeth, politely lie or pretend to be in a good mood or feeling well. And somewhere that night, the funk lifted. A simple, low key evening- and absolutely perfect for me. Homecooked dinner, the fuzzerbugger racing around with his toys, playing taboo for the first time. I wish I could have been there for my actual birthday, rather than at a fancy country club with a room full of strangers.
One of my gifts was a little magnet that reads, "friends are the family you choose for yourself" and how true it is. The more my blood family irritates me, the more I appreciate my friends.
So, there is my AHA! moment- and I bottle the laughter from our evening of playing Taboo and watching Jack race around the condo like a hyperactive energizer bunny. Uncork and enjoy as needed.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Drifting Along
Seems to be the theme of my days now. An endless cycle of logging in, checking the job websites, maybe an interview- and then attempting to figure out what to do with the remaining 14 hours in the day- that doesn't involve spending money.
Maybe it is the heat of summer or the realization that if I walk out the door, I'm going to spend money. Or, it could simply be that I reached my final birthday in my 30's. That was a stunning realization. Oh my god- where did the last 10 years go? Irony? I'm in EXACTLY the same place I was this time 10 years ago. Out of work, facing a career change and freaking out about money. Scary- you bet. 5 year plan.... yeah, right- 'scuse me while i fall on the floor and laugh my #ss off.
I sat here yesterday and indulged in a good, old fashioned pity party. Yes, I'd like some whine for the cheese. And, why shouldn't I? Right after I got fired- or released from Energy Hell as I prefer to think of it, I hit the ground running. I was calling recruiters as I left the parking garage. Rather like the time immediately after someone dies, I got distracted with survival mode, making sure plans were made, unemployment and health insurance arranged- somewhere in there, I forgot to allow myself some time to cry, get pissed and grieve. I miss my paycheck. I miss the few friends I had there more.
Now, the constant rejection settles in- and it is sometimes hard to keep positive. I turned down an offer, early into my search because I knew it wasn't enough to support me. Now, comes the second guessing. I'm horrible with free time on my hands- and not so disciplined with sitting down to "work" on finding a job every single day.
And, having lymes has made me shift in different directions. When you have 4 good hours a day, how do you make the most of them? Lately, my days and nights are totally shifted- they've been doing construction at night, right below my bedroom window for months. I begin to twitch at the sight of a construction worker now. Maybe the Vampire Blood Bank has openings?
No answers, only more questions. Maybe one of these days I'll figure out what I'm supposed to do when I grow up- or not.
Maybe it is the heat of summer or the realization that if I walk out the door, I'm going to spend money. Or, it could simply be that I reached my final birthday in my 30's. That was a stunning realization. Oh my god- where did the last 10 years go? Irony? I'm in EXACTLY the same place I was this time 10 years ago. Out of work, facing a career change and freaking out about money. Scary- you bet. 5 year plan.... yeah, right- 'scuse me while i fall on the floor and laugh my #ss off.
I sat here yesterday and indulged in a good, old fashioned pity party. Yes, I'd like some whine for the cheese. And, why shouldn't I? Right after I got fired- or released from Energy Hell as I prefer to think of it, I hit the ground running. I was calling recruiters as I left the parking garage. Rather like the time immediately after someone dies, I got distracted with survival mode, making sure plans were made, unemployment and health insurance arranged- somewhere in there, I forgot to allow myself some time to cry, get pissed and grieve. I miss my paycheck. I miss the few friends I had there more.
Now, the constant rejection settles in- and it is sometimes hard to keep positive. I turned down an offer, early into my search because I knew it wasn't enough to support me. Now, comes the second guessing. I'm horrible with free time on my hands- and not so disciplined with sitting down to "work" on finding a job every single day.
And, having lymes has made me shift in different directions. When you have 4 good hours a day, how do you make the most of them? Lately, my days and nights are totally shifted- they've been doing construction at night, right below my bedroom window for months. I begin to twitch at the sight of a construction worker now. Maybe the Vampire Blood Bank has openings?
No answers, only more questions. Maybe one of these days I'll figure out what I'm supposed to do when I grow up- or not.
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Her Snarkiness Speaks....
Greetings Minions,
The human is out of the house and being the absent minded ditz, left the computer operational.
News from the Realm:
My enforced winter exile draws to a close in a few short weeks. Arrangements for summer progress will begin soon. It is time for us to journey to the distant borders of our realm and keep the peasants in good order.
Progress is a joyous time. We escape our human keepers, greet the public, wreak havoc at the pavilions and frolic with the the court musicians. The rule of the Faire- dragons always win. Our reward is the loser of the joust. And, tasty they are indeed. Marinated and spit roasted knight- quite the delicacy, especially when accompanied by a fine mead. Ah, rustic living- at times, playing peasant is an amusing diversion.
By some planetary disaster, a hatchling has entered our midst. She is petite, pink, flighty and extraordinarily odd. She happily slobbers on rose quartz. It is my duty to sit upon her and school her in proper dragon snark and etiquette. Thankfully, she does not reside in Palace Mayne. Poor Lord Barney- he has his claws full. Last I saw him, he was looking decidedly frazzled. Note to Human- obtain gin for him. IMMEDIATELY!
And, the Human returns.. must attend to pressing business in the realm.
C
Empress of the Entire Universe
The human is out of the house and being the absent minded ditz, left the computer operational.
News from the Realm:
My enforced winter exile draws to a close in a few short weeks. Arrangements for summer progress will begin soon. It is time for us to journey to the distant borders of our realm and keep the peasants in good order.
Progress is a joyous time. We escape our human keepers, greet the public, wreak havoc at the pavilions and frolic with the the court musicians. The rule of the Faire- dragons always win. Our reward is the loser of the joust. And, tasty they are indeed. Marinated and spit roasted knight- quite the delicacy, especially when accompanied by a fine mead. Ah, rustic living- at times, playing peasant is an amusing diversion.
By some planetary disaster, a hatchling has entered our midst. She is petite, pink, flighty and extraordinarily odd. She happily slobbers on rose quartz. It is my duty to sit upon her and school her in proper dragon snark and etiquette. Thankfully, she does not reside in Palace Mayne. Poor Lord Barney- he has his claws full. Last I saw him, he was looking decidedly frazzled. Note to Human- obtain gin for him. IMMEDIATELY!
And, the Human returns.. must attend to pressing business in the realm.
C
Empress of the Entire Universe
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Patience may be a virtue, but.....
Maybe it is an overrated one. Patience escapes me. I've been waiting to hear feedback on a flurry of job interviews this week, waiting for test results to see if the lymes levels dropped in my system, very eagerly awaiting a delivery of new rubber stamps from my favorite source and most of all, waiting to hear what I'm supposed to do next with my life.
Early this morning, I had the thought of pulling out a tarot deck and reading for myself. It's been quite some time. Generally, if I'm in full out ADD mode I can't even shuffle a deck. It takes focus to read. I don't use tarot cards in my bedroom- opens too many channels for thought and that keeps me from resting at night.
Also had a thought to do some cleaning, but I got over it quickly. Right now, I'm watching from the bedroom window to pounce as soon as the mail hits the box. If the stamps arrive today, I can finish my project. That would be a wonderful feeling- and once the project is done, I'll feel like getting organized.
The tempo of my days lately seems to be presto and adagio- hurry up and wait. Not my favorite song, but for now, I have to learn how to stay with the orchestra.
Early this morning, I had the thought of pulling out a tarot deck and reading for myself. It's been quite some time. Generally, if I'm in full out ADD mode I can't even shuffle a deck. It takes focus to read. I don't use tarot cards in my bedroom- opens too many channels for thought and that keeps me from resting at night.
Also had a thought to do some cleaning, but I got over it quickly. Right now, I'm watching from the bedroom window to pounce as soon as the mail hits the box. If the stamps arrive today, I can finish my project. That would be a wonderful feeling- and once the project is done, I'll feel like getting organized.
The tempo of my days lately seems to be presto and adagio- hurry up and wait. Not my favorite song, but for now, I have to learn how to stay with the orchestra.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Chaos 10, Order 0
If I could find the digital camera, I'd take photos to show the current state of my hovel. Lordy, it is getting the best of me for sure. Hello TLC? Please send out the hoarder's intervention team.
Last trip to Borders, I was browsing through the Fly Lady's books. I like the idea of 15 minute segments. May be just the right ticket- since I have ADD and the attention span of a flea lately. I think I can stick with one task for 15 minutes. Maybe.
In keeping with the upheaval theme, I have a cable company dude crawling on the roof, half my living room torn apart and now, I may have to empty the closet to give him access to a cable wire. The cable company made me switch to digital cable, and since then, the tv is having hissy fits. Yes, I need to clean out the closet. Yes, it is time to find my summer clothes. No, I have absolutely no desire to do this. I just lucked out- no need to empty the closet. And, no need to replace my television set. Huge relief on all sides. I don't have the money to replace the tv set and lack the energy to tackle my closet.
Now, if those wonderful little pile blasting house-elves would come home, I'd be all set.
Last trip to Borders, I was browsing through the Fly Lady's books. I like the idea of 15 minute segments. May be just the right ticket- since I have ADD and the attention span of a flea lately. I think I can stick with one task for 15 minutes. Maybe.
In keeping with the upheaval theme, I have a cable company dude crawling on the roof, half my living room torn apart and now, I may have to empty the closet to give him access to a cable wire. The cable company made me switch to digital cable, and since then, the tv is having hissy fits. Yes, I need to clean out the closet. Yes, it is time to find my summer clothes. No, I have absolutely no desire to do this. I just lucked out- no need to empty the closet. And, no need to replace my television set. Huge relief on all sides. I don't have the money to replace the tv set and lack the energy to tackle my closet.
Now, if those wonderful little pile blasting house-elves would come home, I'd be all set.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
My LIfe in Movie Titles...
It came to me last night that I could apply at least 30 movies titles to describe life in the past 5 years- there truly is a movie for every situation:
Insomniac: Sleepless in Seattle
Family Dynamic: The ADDAMS Family, Addams Family Value
Praying for real email: You've Got Mail
Spark of Creative Genius: Young Frankenstein
Studying for Exams: Mel Brooks' History of the World
Job Hunting: Monty Python's Holy Grail
My job at LD: Nightmare on Elm Street
Puppy wrangling in Vermont: The Beethoven movies (ya know, the ones with the st. Bernard)
Weddings: My Best Friend's Wedding
New Baby- Not Mine!: 9 months
Attempting to play basketball: Air Bud- believe me, the dog looks like Michael Jordan compared to me.
Dressing for my cousin's wedding after a red eye flight to California: corpse bride
Spending time with my family at said wedding: One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
Jury Duty: Time to Kill
Christmas retail season beginning in August: nightmare before Christmas
Spring Insect Visitation: Beetlejuice
Fall Mouse Visitation: Stuart Little
Mom's Passing- Steel Magnolias, StepMom or Terms of Endearment
Getting revenge on dad's near miss engagement to the great white widower shark: first wives club.. best line in that movie.. don't get mad, get everything.
Walking to HR to get fired: Dead Man Walking
Road Trip to Vermont with a good friend of mine: Thelma and Louise
Craving a trip to an alternate reality: Wizard of Oz
Watching my uncle trashed out of his mind at my cousin's wedding: Saturday night fever.. oooh yes, disco is alive and well.
Getting in touch with my inner villainous diva/queen of swords (for you non-tarot folk, she is the queen who tells it like it is- and doesn't hesitate to cut you in the process): Little Mermaid and Snow White
Finding a man who does my bidding: Princess Bride- Wesley was a wise man... "As you wish" should be a part of male vocabulary training.
Being reminded that flirting with the wrong man can be deadly: The Other Boleyn Girl
And, there you have it.. my life in movie titles. Try it- lot harder than you think.
I now return you to our regularly scheduled tedium.
Insomniac: Sleepless in Seattle
Family Dynamic: The ADDAMS Family, Addams Family Value
Praying for real email: You've Got Mail
Spark of Creative Genius: Young Frankenstein
Studying for Exams: Mel Brooks' History of the World
Job Hunting: Monty Python's Holy Grail
My job at LD: Nightmare on Elm Street
Puppy wrangling in Vermont: The Beethoven movies (ya know, the ones with the st. Bernard)
Weddings: My Best Friend's Wedding
New Baby- Not Mine!: 9 months
Attempting to play basketball: Air Bud- believe me, the dog looks like Michael Jordan compared to me.
Dressing for my cousin's wedding after a red eye flight to California: corpse bride
Spending time with my family at said wedding: One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
Jury Duty: Time to Kill
Christmas retail season beginning in August: nightmare before Christmas
Spring Insect Visitation: Beetlejuice
Fall Mouse Visitation: Stuart Little
Mom's Passing- Steel Magnolias, StepMom or Terms of Endearment
Getting revenge on dad's near miss engagement to the great white widower shark: first wives club.. best line in that movie.. don't get mad, get everything.
Walking to HR to get fired: Dead Man Walking
Road Trip to Vermont with a good friend of mine: Thelma and Louise
Craving a trip to an alternate reality: Wizard of Oz
Watching my uncle trashed out of his mind at my cousin's wedding: Saturday night fever.. oooh yes, disco is alive and well.
Getting in touch with my inner villainous diva/queen of swords (for you non-tarot folk, she is the queen who tells it like it is- and doesn't hesitate to cut you in the process): Little Mermaid and Snow White
Finding a man who does my bidding: Princess Bride- Wesley was a wise man... "As you wish" should be a part of male vocabulary training.
Being reminded that flirting with the wrong man can be deadly: The Other Boleyn Girl
And, there you have it.. my life in movie titles. Try it- lot harder than you think.
I now return you to our regularly scheduled tedium.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Greetings Humans
AHA! Finally, an opportunity to get my lovely little claws on the keyboard and play with the human's blog.
Greetings Loyal Minions. I am Cordelia de DragonSnoot. Empress and High Ruler of all Known and Unknown Realms and Universes. Bow and pay tribute- squirming burlap sacks with squeaky toys, amaretto truffles, chests of gold, Chaucer mead and shiny, pointy, sparkly offerings will win you favor. to the one who gifts me with a wolfhound puppy, your place in the realm is secure forever.
I am a rare and precocious Guardian Housedragon. My mission, when I lower myself to perform it is guarding my human caretaker's hearth. She refers to said hovel as Palace Mayne- I call it my temporary purgatory. Until she removes my wards, this meager throne is where I remain imprisoned. Rose Quartz and Moonstone need immediate smiting. I loathe them. To be fair, the Human does on occasion allow me off my perch. So far, I have travelled to Rennie Faires in 3 realms, added my insights to tarot workshops and sometimes get to ride in my chariot when the weather fairies do my bidding.
My most loyal companion is Lord Barney, Lord High Master of Merryment, Mayhem and Marinades. He is the fortunate one. His human grants him access to the gin, freedom to come and go and also entry into the tarot decks, crystals and other fun toys that must sneak around and attempt to snatch when my human is unaware.
Oh bother... the human just saw the dragonslobber on the keyboard...
Until we meet again....
C
Empress of the Universe
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Embracing Blobhood
Bad Rachel!
Yes, I know- enter the realm of blog and you should make an effort to post on a regular basis. Lately, my inner blob seems to be running the show. Short attention span, spring fever, utter boredom. No motivation. The house is a mess, I still don't have steady employment. Last week, I had a major job interview, Sacred Circle, endless hours of alphabetizing files on a temp assignment and a major weekend. Two day artist and spiritual worker's event. I'm tired- all of this takes lots of energy. Moving takes energy. Thinking about moving takes energy... lately, my thought ranges to... hmmm, couch, library book.. hmmm... let's be a blob today.
I look around my house and cringe. My outer packrat is winning the war over my inner neatfreak. There are bits of projects EVERYWHERE. Stamps and scrapbook supplies overtaking the kitchen table. Thousands of beads in little cups overtaking the coffee table, laundry is slowly winning the bedroom territory. And, while most people have dustbunnies under the bed, mine have morphed into full grown, yapping standard sized dustpoodles. I might add that they grow vicious when attacked with a vacuum cleaner.
Irony- I love a clean, organized tranquil home. I have ADD- routine, order and organization are what allows me to function in the world. Truth- I loathe cleaning, organizing and always having to finish one project, clean it up and put it away as soon as it is complete. A gift of ADD is creativity sparks all the time- the flip side of the coin is you almost have to act on it immediately or it is gone forever. writing down only helps if you can find the bloody notebook to do so.
So was life last week- maybe tonight, I'll actually put sheets back on the bed. I stripped it 2 weeks ago.
Yes, I know- enter the realm of blog and you should make an effort to post on a regular basis. Lately, my inner blob seems to be running the show. Short attention span, spring fever, utter boredom. No motivation. The house is a mess, I still don't have steady employment. Last week, I had a major job interview, Sacred Circle, endless hours of alphabetizing files on a temp assignment and a major weekend. Two day artist and spiritual worker's event. I'm tired- all of this takes lots of energy. Moving takes energy. Thinking about moving takes energy... lately, my thought ranges to... hmmm, couch, library book.. hmmm... let's be a blob today.
I look around my house and cringe. My outer packrat is winning the war over my inner neatfreak. There are bits of projects EVERYWHERE. Stamps and scrapbook supplies overtaking the kitchen table. Thousands of beads in little cups overtaking the coffee table, laundry is slowly winning the bedroom territory. And, while most people have dustbunnies under the bed, mine have morphed into full grown, yapping standard sized dustpoodles. I might add that they grow vicious when attacked with a vacuum cleaner.
Irony- I love a clean, organized tranquil home. I have ADD- routine, order and organization are what allows me to function in the world. Truth- I loathe cleaning, organizing and always having to finish one project, clean it up and put it away as soon as it is complete. A gift of ADD is creativity sparks all the time- the flip side of the coin is you almost have to act on it immediately or it is gone forever. writing down only helps if you can find the bloody notebook to do so.
So was life last week- maybe tonight, I'll actually put sheets back on the bed. I stripped it 2 weeks ago.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
New Baby
I am the proud owner of a spiffy not to mention speedy new MacBook. Overall, it hasn't been too painful- I learned how to set up my wireless mouse, need to still figure out why my old usb cables aren't happy with the new computer and printer, and why, my beloved bookworm game and some of my itunes aren't coming over and letting me in to play on the new laptop.
man, growing pains- new computer, having to totally reconfigure my desk area- the new printer is a monster and everything else. the joys of technology- my little ibook was a simple, happy soul- this new beastie? well, i'm sure we'll become good friends soon.
and, i've worked around that annoying thing that doesn't allow me to post normally.... come on guys, make it work in safari- explorer isn't a happy place to be anymore.
now late, i'm tired and my house is still a crazed mess of boxes, packing materials and other debris. oh, did i mention my shower is almost completely untiled? the bathroom smells like a swamp. thank god for gym memberships- least there is a shower there.
happy happy joy joy
rachel
man, growing pains- new computer, having to totally reconfigure my desk area- the new printer is a monster and everything else. the joys of technology- my little ibook was a simple, happy soul- this new beastie? well, i'm sure we'll become good friends soon.
and, i've worked around that annoying thing that doesn't allow me to post normally.... come on guys, make it work in safari- explorer isn't a happy place to be anymore.
now late, i'm tired and my house is still a crazed mess of boxes, packing materials and other debris. oh, did i mention my shower is almost completely untiled? the bathroom smells like a swamp. thank god for gym memberships- least there is a shower there.
happy happy joy joy
rachel
Sunday, March 23, 2008
The Wheel of Fortune
The word for this month is OOOOOFFFFF!!!! Holy cow- no sooner did I post my first blog and I was invited to go take a walk to HR. It was gory. My time in energy hell is over. Interesting, I was dead calm, my boss was in tears. I held it together until I hit the car and then the how am I going to survive panic attack commenced. Doesn't matter that you know it is inevitable and prepared- when it happens, it is a solid punch to the solar plexus and it takes weeks to get your breath back again.
I am a student of the Tarot. Indeed, I have about 20 different decks lurking around the house when I'm in need of lessons, inspiration and insight. Most have a tendancy to give me readings that well, kick my tush- hard. And, lately, I'm reminded of how much my life resembles the Fool (Card 0) in his/her journey through the deck.
The Fool is all innocence- eyes wide open, everything is new, opportunities and possibilities. Most decks show a young adult, male or female carrying everything needed, neatly tied McGyver style into a bundle on a stick. Faithful dogger by your side for company and to keep you from happily skipping over the cliff. To date, our Fool has met a number of wise teachers and received good counsel. And, now we come to the middle, pivotal place in the journey- card number 10- the Wheel of Fortune.
I ponder the numbers. I was fired on 3/7. 3+7=10- card number 10? Right, the Wheel. Card number three is the Empress- the mommy card. Nurture, creativity, fertile ideas. Card number 7? The chariot- all about staying balanced to keep the chariot moving ahead and the wheels from getting stuck in the sand. Yipes! The Wheel is about cycles. It is a breath before our Fool meets the life impacting heavy hitters in the Devil, Death and Tower cards. Beginnings, Endings and spinning around the wheel to see where the next path begins.
Alas, I am no longer that happy innocent Fool. took the risk, went over the edge of the cliff in bliss- have the bruised ego to prove it. And, I have no idea of what I'm supposed to do next. Scary yes- exciting as well. Maybe it is time to go back to school or push TreeSpirit out there and see if I can make a go of doing the creative, spiritual work I love.
I did a reading right before I posted this blog... so typical of my life: 3 cards- body, mind, spirit.
2 of Swords Fool Reversed Wheel of Fortune
Basically, stuck by analysis paralysis, possibilities limited, needing to be careful and aware of surroundings and cycles occurring again.
It is a good thing I have a sense of humor and am too stubborn to give up. Moving back in with Dad and his girlfriend is so not an option.
Blessed Be,
Rachel
I am a student of the Tarot. Indeed, I have about 20 different decks lurking around the house when I'm in need of lessons, inspiration and insight. Most have a tendancy to give me readings that well, kick my tush- hard. And, lately, I'm reminded of how much my life resembles the Fool (Card 0) in his/her journey through the deck.
The Fool is all innocence- eyes wide open, everything is new, opportunities and possibilities. Most decks show a young adult, male or female carrying everything needed, neatly tied McGyver style into a bundle on a stick. Faithful dogger by your side for company and to keep you from happily skipping over the cliff. To date, our Fool has met a number of wise teachers and received good counsel. And, now we come to the middle, pivotal place in the journey- card number 10- the Wheel of Fortune.
I ponder the numbers. I was fired on 3/7. 3+7=10- card number 10? Right, the Wheel. Card number three is the Empress- the mommy card. Nurture, creativity, fertile ideas. Card number 7? The chariot- all about staying balanced to keep the chariot moving ahead and the wheels from getting stuck in the sand. Yipes! The Wheel is about cycles. It is a breath before our Fool meets the life impacting heavy hitters in the Devil, Death and Tower cards. Beginnings, Endings and spinning around the wheel to see where the next path begins.
Alas, I am no longer that happy innocent Fool. took the risk, went over the edge of the cliff in bliss- have the bruised ego to prove it. And, I have no idea of what I'm supposed to do next. Scary yes- exciting as well. Maybe it is time to go back to school or push TreeSpirit out there and see if I can make a go of doing the creative, spiritual work I love.
I did a reading right before I posted this blog... so typical of my life: 3 cards- body, mind, spirit.
2 of Swords Fool Reversed Wheel of Fortune
Basically, stuck by analysis paralysis, possibilities limited, needing to be careful and aware of surroundings and cycles occurring again.
It is a good thing I have a sense of humor and am too stubborn to give up. Moving back in with Dad and his girlfriend is so not an option.
Blessed Be,
Rachel
Friday, March 7, 2008
Lurking no longer....
I can't believe I've started to blog. I'm a reluctant joiner from a long and noble line of reluctant joiners. Must confess, I've been sipping the punch for a while, by visiting a couple of blogs created by friends. Over the years, I have kept journals, but not as a regular habit. so much easier to type. Handwriting? BAH!
I love words. I especially love words strung together that make me think, cry, laugh and above all, challenge me to change my perspective. The greatest irony in my life- I work in a numbers oriented field. Numbers are not my friends. On get your left brain day, I did what any intelligent right brain person would do- slept late.
So, my day job sucks my life, soul and brain out with a bendy straw- but my love and real work in the world is my fledging cosmic muffin business- TreeSpirit Treasures. No website yet- but I've been playing with designing tarot bags, boxes, greeting cards and other assorted necessities for those who enjoy exploring the spiritual realm of the universe. I also study tarot, runes and pretty much anything that catches my eye. Should that include shiny, pointy, sparkly objects- ie: jewelry, beads, swords or shopping, well, I'm a blissful girl. My dream is that TreeSpirit becomes my full time job- in a snug little cottage with dedicated workroom/studio space.
No kids- but I do have a housedragon. Cordelia is a purple, green and silver snark filled monstrosity. She has enough ego for 100 humans and at least 10 dragons. I"m sure she'll be making her presence known. For now, all you need to know is that she is the Empress of The Universe, All Known and All Unknown Realms. Her "job" is to guard my home and keep the unfriendlies out. She does a good job. Must say, Cordie was one of the best and most creative housewarming gifts I've ever received. She's also hell to raise. Forget parenthood- you want a challenge? Try a housedragon.
More ranting later-
Rachel
I love words. I especially love words strung together that make me think, cry, laugh and above all, challenge me to change my perspective. The greatest irony in my life- I work in a numbers oriented field. Numbers are not my friends. On get your left brain day, I did what any intelligent right brain person would do- slept late.
So, my day job sucks my life, soul and brain out with a bendy straw- but my love and real work in the world is my fledging cosmic muffin business- TreeSpirit Treasures. No website yet- but I've been playing with designing tarot bags, boxes, greeting cards and other assorted necessities for those who enjoy exploring the spiritual realm of the universe. I also study tarot, runes and pretty much anything that catches my eye. Should that include shiny, pointy, sparkly objects- ie: jewelry, beads, swords or shopping, well, I'm a blissful girl. My dream is that TreeSpirit becomes my full time job- in a snug little cottage with dedicated workroom/studio space.
No kids- but I do have a housedragon. Cordelia is a purple, green and silver snark filled monstrosity. She has enough ego for 100 humans and at least 10 dragons. I"m sure she'll be making her presence known. For now, all you need to know is that she is the Empress of The Universe, All Known and All Unknown Realms. Her "job" is to guard my home and keep the unfriendlies out. She does a good job. Must say, Cordie was one of the best and most creative housewarming gifts I've ever received. She's also hell to raise. Forget parenthood- you want a challenge? Try a housedragon.
More ranting later-
Rachel
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